Bed of Roses
by Shrugs
Summary: Each of the men of Soul Society have had their hearts ripped out, in different ways than each other. And somehow, they always manage to blame themselves. Multiple Pairings, Drabbles
1. Shunsui

**Disclaimer: **I own absolutely nothing. This is a story I got an idea from my friends for. The song Bed of Roses by Bon Jovi was playing at my sister's wedding. Litakino22 and Serena-Tsukino66 were talking about how it fit Byakuya, but I thought they were talking about Shunsui. And, so looking over the lyrics, I decided to fit it to three captains. Shunsui, Byakuya, and Hitsugaya. Looking back, there are other members of Soul Society this idea could work for, including Ichimaru, Renji, etc. If you have anyone you'd like to read about later on, let me know and I might do it.

Shunsui is pretty OOC here, and he might be the only one I do that to. I had a story planned where he wasn't always so happy and calm, and I decided instead to use the idea here.

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_Sitting here wasted and wounded  
At this old piano  
Trying hard to capture  
The moment this morning I don't know  
'Cause a bottle of vodka  
Is still lodged in my head  
And some blonde gave me nightmares  
I think that she's still in my bed  
As I dream about movies  
They won't make of me when I'm dead_

He was a wreck.

The face he showed all the others was nothing but a mask. A mask to show everyone that he was alright, that he wasn't something to worry about.

At night, the feelings he had kept from his friends and subordinates came out. No longer stood the lazy, happy man that frustrated his lieutenant and caused most to frown at him. Instead he was more than just a drunk, he was a man who wallowed in self pity. A man who used his mask to hide all of his past he wanted to forget.

The ones he couldn't protect. The ones he was too late to save.

All these years he had become a shell of a person. One that not even his closest friend Ukitake could fix. And he had made a fatal mistake.

He had fallen in love.

Nanao was unbelievably perfect. Strong headed, forceful when she needed to be. And she did what no one else would do. She pushed him forward, argued with him in a manor that everyone was too afraid to address their captain.

He couldn't be with her. As much as he cared for her, he wouldn't even try. They said if you truly loved someone, you would set them free. And he did, he pushed her away so that his life wouldn't bring her down, so she could stay strong.

He tried to bury his thoughts of her with women he'd meet at night. They only made her face burn inside his mind.

He treated her like all the other girls. Flirted endlessly, to an embarrassing level. He tried, at least.

But unlike all the other girls--no matter how strong she was, he wouldn't let her fight. He'd hold her back, just a little. If she was ever hurt, he wouldn't be able to stand himself.

For now, however, that would have to do. Because the look in her eyes as he diswayed her from another fight nearly made him want to forget it all. To drop the act. To show her that he could love her for more than just her beauty.

That he could love her because in all ways, she was perfect.

_With an ironclad fist I wake up and  
French kiss the morning  
While some marching band keeps  
Its own beat in my head  
While we're talking  
About all of the things that I long to believe  
About love the truth and  
What you mean to me  
And the truth is  
baby you're all that I need_

_I want to lay you down in a bed of roses  
For tonite I sleep on a bed of nails  
I want to be just as close as the Holy Ghost is  
And lay you down on a bed of roses_

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There's that, next is Byakuya. If you're interested drop a review or something! 


	2. Byakuya

Disclaimer: Once again, Bleach isn't mine. Sue me. Or rather the point, don't sue me. This chapter wasn't as fun to write as Shunsui's because, well...I got to make up Shunsui's inner demon and Byakuya's, I didn't.

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_**Byakuya**_

_Well I'm so far away  
That each step that I take is on my way home  
A king's ransom in dimes I'd given each night  
Just to see through this payphone  
Still I run out of time  
Or it's hard to get through_

He had loved her so much. Byakuya wasn't quite sure how it had even happened. He had been raised a proper noble son, been entirely perfect. The moment he met her, however, he would have given it all up in a second.

She had been so independant, so sure of herself. It wasn't something he was used to--not haven't to cloud over someone, to be their support.

But she never used her crutch. He went out of his way, something a man of his standards rarely had to do, in order to pursue her. Something seemed to be keeping her away from him.

Then finally he won her. It was a blissful memory, the day he took her to be his wife. Even as she seemed distant, he couldn't help but feel prideful. Hisana was his, no one elses.

As always, the smile never lasted long. Those years were a fraction of a shinigami's lifespan, and to have her taken away was so cruel.

That didn't stop her from always flooding into his mind. The regret that he hadn't been with her on her search for Rukia. What sort of man was he, to allow the sole person he loved to wander alone? He should have been by her side. This ate away at his soul every night.

But even now, sometimes he thought he could feel her. A small presence, as if she was watching him. What he'd give to see her smile again, but she always hid herself away in the shadows, her spirit taunting him.

Sometimes he thought he could hear her, a tiny whisper in his ear telling him how much she loved him, how she waited for him.

And for once he wanted to be the one that could have taken that fall for her. To take her tiny hand in his and lead her back to him. To show her just how much he loved her.

But all he had now was his empty life, empty heart, and the empty bed beside him.

_Til the bird on the wire flies me back to you  
I'll just close my eyes and whisper,  
Baby blind love is true_

_I want to lay you down in a bed of roses  
For tonite I sleep on a bed of nails_

_I want to be just as close as the Holy Ghost is  
And lay you down on a bed of roses_

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So all that's left is our little Hitsugaya, unless I decide to add in some more characters later on without the aid of lyrics. R/R!


	3. Hitsugaya

_Disclaimer: I own nothing._

Okay, so this is Hitsugaya's chapter. Took me forever to write before for some reason, even though Hitsugaya and Hinamori are two of my favorite characters...it was awkward writing it... Enjoy . Oh, I also took out one stanza from the song because it REALLY didn't fit Hitsugaya.

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_Now as you close your eyes  
Know I'll be thinking about you  
While my mistress she calls me  
To stand in her spotlight again  
Tonite I won't be alone  
But you know that don't Mean I'm not lonely  
I've got nothing to prove  
For it's you that I'd die to defend_

Was there ever a time that someone had felt so worthless, they were able to fall to the ground without a second chance? To just wither away because they didn't deserve to live anymore?

Watching her lay there was something he did on a regular occasion. Every day he would come to the room, and just watch over her broken body. Had he known--had he had just a guess at what was really happening, he never would have left her side. He would have stopped Aizen. He could have saved her, even if it cost him his life.

Instead she was nothing more than a shell. She never spoke, never moved, and day after day never woke up. So often he had tried to coax her eyes open. Whispering words to her, letting her know what had been going on since she had first entered her coma. How her friends were doing, telling her she had to get better soon because Kira was blaming himself and she had to set him straight since no one else seemed to be able to.

He went into stories about their childhood. Anything to make a connection. Anything to give her a reason to wake up.

Anything to make her want to stay with him.

Now he no longer spoke. Words weren't necessary for anything, because what he wanted to say couldn't be explained. It was something only a look could carry the message. And he wanted her to know that he was angry at her. Angry that she had gone without him, angry she believed in Aizen before him--angry that she would fall into this sleep and not wake up, torturing him.

He could be angry at her, but never hate her. The hate he felt inside, however, was reserved for himself. The one who hadn't followed after her. He too believed avery word that came from Aizen. And he was the one that couldn't wake her up.

He had sworn he would always look after her. It wasn't something he ever told to her face, but a promise he kept to himself. He used to hate adults, because they never kept promises. That was something he would always do--but now he had broken the most important one.

The body that laid before him would always be a painful reminder, yet it was something more. It made him realize that one day, he could really lose her entirely--and knowing what it felt like now, it was something that he would never allow to happen.

Clenching his fists, he gave her one last glance. Without any words or a second look back, he walked out the door with a flutter of his robe. Now wasn't the time to grieve or to blame himself for anything. The time for that would always be there.

Now was the time to kill--to kill the man that had destroyed half of him before Hitsugaya had fallen before his zanpakutou.

_I want to lay you down in a bed of roses  
For tonite I sleep on a bed of nails  
I want to be just as close as the Holy Ghost is  
And lay you down on a bed of roses_

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_Alright, so there that is. PLEASE no reviews about how you don't like Hinamori. She is one of my favorite characters so just keep that detail to yourself. Just comment on the chapter itself rather than any pairing suggestions. I really just wanted to capture a darker side to Hitsugaya. Really the lines up on the top made me think of Hitsugaya's thoughts on Hinamori. I wouldn't really call Matsumoto the 'mistress' and what not, so I didn't mention her, but if you wish to think that way you can, haha. 

Oh, so I'm going to mark this as complete for now since it's the whole Bed of Roses set. I do, however, want to continue it. Especially Ichimaru's part. I just have so many other stories to write meantime, however, so maybe after I finish Kon's Transfer of Love I'll pick this up again. Just let me know if you really want me to add to it or have any characters other than Ichimaru you really want (I will decide whether or not they have potential, though, haha) 


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